Salt Licks and Solar Flares

Scenario 1: you're on the beach, in perfect weather, enjoying the sun. It's a beautiful day, it's warm on your skin, and you're feeling good. Then the sun inexplicably and in violation of all physics draws closer to the earth. Your retinas are obliterated, your skin is crispy. If you're still alive, you're in agony.

Scenario 2: you're eating a lovely salted caramel brownie in a cute little café with a cup of coffee (or tea, or whatever you like). The waitress comes around and asks how everything is, and you tell her it's delicious, and you love salted caramel. "Great!", she says, pulling out a bag of sea salt and dumping the whole thing on top of the brownie so that it fills the entire plate and overflows into your lap. You're then forced to eat the whole thing.

What is the common thread between the two? Light is one of the most amazing things in all God's creation. Light comes with hope, warmth, and renewed life. Salt gives food flavor - even sweet foods. It enhances, changes flavors, and can make all the difference in some dishes. But if someone gets too much of either in a concentrated, intense dose, they're in for high blood pressure and 3rd degree burns.

You can see where I'm going with this - Matthew 5, 13-14.

13 You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.

14 You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. 

15 Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. 

16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

Now, these verses deal with not losing our love for the Lord, our zeal for sharing his salvation. With making sure that we are improving the lives of those around us by giving His love to others. But I want to talk about the opposite extreme. 

If you'll allow me another unrelated analogy, imagine someone wanted you to be able to put your foot behind your head like a contortionist (I used to be able to - 20 years and many pounds ago). The first option is that they help you stretch daily, encourage you, and let your body adjust. The second is that they yank your foot behind your head, tearing ligaments and possibly doing irreparable damage.

Don't like any of those? Maybe you garden. Do you plant a seed, then aim a fire hose at the soil where it's sown? Do you scream at the soil to demand it give you your azaleas? If you do, I'd be interested to know how many flowers you've actually grown. 

Whether you prefer the example of scorching sun, a plate of salt, or ripped muscle tissue, we as Christians are capable of doing this as we honor and obey the Great Commission. In our excitement to share eternal salvation, love, and our Heavenly Father with others, we hit them with all of it at once. We don't necessarily know where they're coming from, we're not meeting them there and guiding them along. We're dumping, yanking, and forcing. However good our intentions are, our actions can actually do a great deal to push people away from the church because they associate it with aggressiveness, lack of understanding, and pain.

I'm not telling you that you shouldn't be enthusiastic, or assertive, or firm in your sharing. I encourage you to be all of those things, even as I grow into more comfort with sharing outside of this blog. But it needs to be done in a Christ-like way. As someone I've now forgotten once said, "Jesus didn't say to Peter 'Get in this boat right now or you're going to Hell!'" He invited him, as he was, in his circumstances, to follow Him. To be in relationship with Him. God walked in the garden with Adam and Eve - He didn't stand under the tree to shout reminders at them all day. (And yes, they may have stayed away from it if He had, but sin will always find us because we are human.)

How can we meet them where they are? Ask yourself (or them if you don't know them well enough) some questions. What does that person believe now? What trauma might they have suffered that they associate with God or the church (for example, an abusive parent whipping them for perceived sins, abuse by a church official, humiliation in front of a congregation that believes in naming and shaming rather than lovingly confronting)? What are the barriers to belief? What is something you have in common with them that they can relate to? That you can build on? What part of your testimony speaks to something in their life? Start there.

And now for the truly hard part. You don't get to decide in whom you till soil, plant seeds, or water those already planted. You can't just plop down a fully grown oak tree in their heart and soul. But if you approach them with love, understanding, compassion, and conviction rather than condemnation, you are more likely to have an effect on them. You don't know what type of soil the seed will fall on if you do scatter them, but that is not up to us - we don't get to control that. 

So give love, speak life, share God, and ask Him to bless your work. You may be surprised what springs up.

American Idol(atry)

"For God so loved America that he sent his only son to -"

"Thou shalt never question your political leader even if -"

"Let he who is born in the US of A throw all sorts of stones because they're just better -"

Be honest - do you know anyone who seems to think the quotes above could absolutely be from the Bible? For whom the trinity seems to be a quad comprised of the Father, the Son, the Holy Spirit, and the Red White and Blue? Maybe you are that person. I'm not here to judge or make fun, but if you are that person, this post may not be your favorite of mine. Why? Because of the next line, and basically all the ones after it.

Many American values are completely antithetical to Christianity, and are not ideals Jesus would have led people to.

There is an entire church predicated on the idea that I'm dead wrong about Jesus and America, and if you'd like to answer the door the next time those nice young boys from the Mormon church come knocking on your door, you're welcome to let them in to hear all about it. I've talked to them, read the literature, and remain deeply unconvinced.

If I start off in a completely hypothetical space, it'll even look like I'm proving myself wrong here (which our good Lord knows I've done on more than one occasion). What are our hypothetical/publicized values?

Truth. Great start - Jesus loves truth. He is the way, the truth, and the light. He wants us to tell the truth. He gives us the truth. 

Justice. Golly, we're practically identical already. God is the creator of and arbiter of justice. He himself is just, and we can keep faith in Him because we know He will remain so.

Freedom. We are set free from the bondage of sin by the grace and salvation of Christ Jesus. And you all know I can't get enough of Beth Moore's study "Breaking Free."

So where's the problem? Did I lose one too many brain cells to Covid this past week and start the article wrong? Am I an America-hating, rebellion-stirring monster? 

No. Because what I'm talking about are the values I actually see acted out here. The American values I see held highest are these:

• Freedom - "I get to do whatever I want - I have rights. You can't make me. I won't do it. I'll do it if I want to. Other people may have a problem with it, but that's not on me."

I have sixteen places I could start here. While I'm sticking to biblical backup, I'd also like to throw in the very common sense quote I can't properly credit for lack of knowledge, "My right to swing my fist ends at the tip of your nose." You can drive your car, but not onto someone's lawn. You could smoke in a restaurant in the 90s, but it was still frowned upon to blow it in a stranger's face. You technically can go around licking hand rails, but I certainly wouldn't recommend it - for your health or anyone else's.

Jesus' freedom is not the do what you want when you want and darn the consequences kind. Matthew, 11:28-30 says "Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

Notice that it doesn't say there will be no yoke. Jesus doesn't say our shoulders will be free and clear so we can go skipping off to do as we please. When our hearts are full of God's grace, we have freedom to do as He wishes. Not as we do. You may have noticed at some point in time that not one of us knows what's best for us. Not one of us. No, not even you. When we use our American freedom to do things that fly in the face of the things God wants us to use His freedom for, we are very much of this world.

• Patriotism/pride - "This is the best country in the world. If you don't like it then leave, and don't let the door hit you on the way out. How dare you speak out against our president. Other countries don't do things like we do because we're better and they should be more like us."

First of all, I'd like you to raise your hand if you chose to be born in the USA. Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? Great. Now that that's sorted, how many of you have lived in another country long enough to completely experience the place and not just whatever blips come up on the news about it from time to time? And no, the cruise you took doesn't count.

Some of you may have lived in those places long enough. Some of you may have been born elsewhere and moved here. But none of you born here chose it. No one whose parents brought them here as children chose it. 

Second, if you do love something, you want it to be better. That's why marriage counseling exists. I hope I'm not bursting any bubbles by saying that nothing in your life is perfect. No job, country, person, relationship - nothing. If you want to enable it and stick your fingers in your ears whenever someone brings up a flaw, that's some deeply codependent muck I'm not wading through. That's why therapists in general exist.

Third, it is OK to admit that something another country does is good or could be good, and it DOES NOT MAKE YOU A COMMUNIST. You're allowed to like other systems. France has a great one for water. Iceland has a great one for power. Doesn't mean I'm moving onto a commune in Paris or Rekjavik, but it's ok to not think America is the best at literally everything. Really - I swear. God made all of us, in all countries, and loves us all. It's fine.

Fourth - your political candidate is not God. Nope, not that one. Nope, not that one either. If you're taking everything out of their mouth as gospel, you need to re-read the actual gospel. And maybe check out what happens with idol-worshipping in the Old Testament. Spoiler: it's not good.

• Individualism - "I worked hard to get where I am and if someone is poor that means they're just lazy. Why should I have to help feed people who can't afford it? No one helped me get where I am - I am a SELF-MADE man/woman."

Why is it that I hear these so many times from Christians? "Well, Stephane," you might say, "because it's true." 

Take a step back and look at it again. Who do we glorify in our actions? To whom do we give credit for our triumphs? We don't have anything but what WHO gave us?

That's right - God. You cannot stand secure in your job. In your house. In your vehicle. Job certainly couldn't. You didn't bring water forth from a stone by yourself. Moses didn't. One flood. One fire. One bad enough injury. One act of God could give you multitudes beyond what you have and one act could take it all away so that you have nothing but Him to lean on.

Matthew 25. "When I was hungry you cut funding to the programs to feed me and told me to get a job. When I was thirsty, you poisoned my water with factory runoff. When I was naked, you turned up your nose and passed me, muttering about the homeless."

It's an exaggeration, sure, but not by much. And when you do help, do you only reach out a hand to those who look like you? Act like you? Live like you? Do you only have compassion for people going through things you already have and have firsthand knowledge of? It's easy to love people who are similar to ourselves, but that's not where God asks us to stop. 

• Self-Righteousness - "I'm just glad I'm not like that. I would never do that. That thing is unforgiveable."

Jesus died on the cross for our sins, but only the really repugnant ones like rape and murder. Right? Because that's certainly how we (and definitely I more than once) can tend to act. As though that nasty rumor you passed on last week, or the office supplies you took home, or your failure to help another human being didn't drive the nail just the same. Remember the loveable prayer "Thank you that I'm not like that sinful tax collector"? That one went over like a lead balloon for a reason.

Here's where I make people even more upset because there are only two things I hear Christians around me talking about at least 90% of the time when they talk about sin: homosexuality and abortion. I deeply refuse to talk about my stance on abortion again - it's toward the beginning of the blog if you need it, and I'm far too tired to unearth it to be just a piece of this writing. 

I'm told that I should be a "single issue voter" and vote a certain way just because of abortion rights. That it's good to not worry about any of the rest because this is so horrific that the rest doesn't matter. I am deeply horrified by dead babies. And dead women. And dead children. And dead men. And people in poverty. People who are starving. People who had abortions because they had no access to proper education and thought you could only get pregnant in a certain position. People wasting away in prison for something that should have been a slap on the wrist because the judge was in a mood or because the for-profit prison system is...something I'd need a whole other post on.

The idea that there are only a couple of things that are THE BIG BAD and that other sins are ok is certainly understandable. There are some things that just hit us harder than others. And I know that it's possible to care about 100 things but only talk about two of them. But it seems that the things most talked about are ones that can be preached along party lines, and that I do take issue with. As my friend Beth (who is usually the shore I wash up on when I know I've been in the whale's belly for too long and need to get going) said, God wants us to don our armor and take up His sword and stand our ground - ground He already won. But here we are picking a particular hill on that ground and throwing rocks. It's as if we don't believe that He can hold the ground - we have to thump enough of these bad guy sinners over here and no, don't worry about that log in my eye. I'm not saying we don't convict. I'm not saying we don't share the word. I'm just saying the population of these two hills is way too high, and some hills have been thoroughly abandoned - oddly enough, usually the ones that the most people who profess to be Christians are committing themselves and would prefer to think aren't so bad.

• "Truth" - "There is no discussion here because I'm right and you're wrong. I won't listen to anything except for what confirms my political and social beliefs already, so I'll always believe this way no matter what. 

This one is deeply tricky. I have faith in God. I will not be swayed from that faith in God. There's not enough evidence in the world to turn me because I'm not operating on evidence. I'm operating on faith. We all are. 

Unfortunately, that tends to bleed out into other areas of our life where the object of our belief isn't a perfect creator - it's a human being, or a human idea. A nutjob (bless their heart) with a blog. A corporation lying for profit. A politician lying to advance their platform. 

One of my favorite examples of this requires me to go outside of the Bible and into one of my favorite court cases - Stella Liebeck v. McDonalds. McDonalds paid a lot of marketing and PR people a lot of money to paint Ms. Liebeck as a money-grubbing idiot who got millions of dollars for not knowing coffee was hot. There is even an unofficial award given in her name to the most frivolous lawsuits each year. It's common sense, right? Their story makes sense. She spilled her coffee, got mad about it, and got some crazy lawyer. It happens all the time.

Only it didn't happen that way.

Stella (if I may be so bold - I don't know the woman, but I like to think she'd be ok with it given that I'm defending her) was handed a coffee that was 30-40 degrees hotter than it should have been, which McDonalds had been warned about previously. Literal hundreds of people, including children, had been burned already, and no action was taken to correct it.

She sustained third degree burns over 15% of her body (including thighs and genitals - yowch), which is bad enough even if you aren't 79. Multiple procedures and skin grafts were involved, and the recovery took two years. She asked for $15,000-20,000 to cover her hospital bills. As we all know - those can get extensive. They countered with an offer of $800. Total. So she took it to court, and was awarded punitive damages.

This is a story so well established that the "didn't know coffee was hot" is a major part of the cultural zeitgeist when talking about lawsuits. I didn't know the real story until my 20s. Many still don't. And the "facts" shared by McDonalds' spin artists are still spewed to this day.

Nothing else in this world is God, and nothing else deserves that much of your faith. What's worse, sharing incorrect information makes people who aren't believers say, "Yikes - if they'll believe that easily verified lie, they'll believe anything. God must be on the same level as that nonsense."

The short wrap here for anyone who just spent a lot of time scrolling wondering if I ever shut up (I don't) is that American values and Christian values don't always line up. Not all human rights are American rights and vice versa. I'm an American. I'm a Christian. And I can be both - but not if I don't use careful discernment, humility, scripture, and faith every day.

Conflicted Catholocism

I started to write this post last December. There's still a saved draft sitting there that I didn't turn into this actual post because I wanted to start fresh. What's worse than the fact that it's been 6 months since I started is that it's been over a year since this one was put on my heart. I've been living in a whale belly for so long that I've built a house out of the ribs.

I need to be 100% clear that this post is based on my experience being raised Catholic and mine alone. I cannot speak for anyone else's experience. I've been given stories and anecdotes by others, but I'm not here to pile on. I'm here to bring some things out into the light that I've noticed, and let you make of them what you will.

As a Catholic, I knew jack with a side of squat about the bible. Everything I did know about it, I knew from my sister's Precious Moments book of kids' bible stories. Tiny, bite-sized, easily digested, heavily filtered heavenly father. I often say I knew God to say hi to in the hallways, but not have a conversation with. Now that I've been away from it for longer than I was in it, I've pinpointed the "why" in my case. 

1) We were never encouraged to read the Bible. Never. Church on Sundays was a gospel, a reading from whatever book (often the same ones on rotation), and a quick homily that held no more biblical wisdom than a bumper sticker. It was as though the conceit of the past that holy texts were only for the privileged few was still in full force. If we needed to know anything from the Bible, the priest would tell us. There was no need to go digging for ourselves. I also now wonder if that's because they knew that so much of what is practiced in a Catholic church has no foundation in God's word. 

On top of this, questions were not only discouraged, but actively looked down on. To ask a question, to try to get context or clarification, was to reveal that you were a bad Catholic - how dare you not just take your regurgitated, rotated 6 Bible verses and never want more. I figured that had to be right back then, but now I find it quite ludicrous. To quote a pastor I heard a few years back in a multi-church gathering, "God can handle your questions." The idea that the Almighty can't handle confusion from human hearts and minds about cosmic wonders and the grand design is such a narrow view. 

And so much is lost in not asking. My pastor takes questions. He explains historical context. He brings in other verses to clarify. And when I leave a sermon, I leave knowing and understanding more. Knowing God more. Feeling closer to my Father, and to understanding. To rob people of that deep, rich, three-dimensional view of our creator is surely a cruel act, meant as such or not.

2) Access to God and His promised gifts was restricted. In Exodus, access to God's presence is, in fact, restricted. The entire encampment couldn't just go pull up a cushion and chit chat. But He did give gifts directly to the people even then - mana, quail, water. And if you fast-forward into the New Testament, (spoiler alert - it's a big one), Jesus dies for our sins so that we may approach the father. We are His beloved children, ever welcome. Why, then, when the Bible says we can talk to God directly and confess our sins to him, does the Catholic church require confession to a priest? God's grace doesn't need an earthly bouncer. His forgiveness doesn't come from our actions, but from the changed heart behind it. 

The idea that ritualistic "penance" somehow has the power to cleanse rather than God himself is deeply arrogant, though I'm quite sure most don't intend it that way. That sins can be forgiven posthumously via prayers from others, when that soul is no longer earthbound to experience a change of heart reeks of the indulgences from "purgatory" in medieval times.

This, too, led to me not wanting to "bother" God with anything that wasn't life or death. I prayed every night, but I didn't bring anything to Him that wasn't a capital "P" Problem. I imagined I was annoying Him. Bugging Him. Asking for help without trying to fix it myself. Which, if you're familiar with the Bible, is what you're not supposed to do. He wants us to go to him first. He wants to be there with us for everything - big and little. Unlike older siblings, God doesn't mind when you talk for ages. He's happy to hear his children.

3) Ritual is prized over relationship. I didn't see a focus on relationship with God. With His attributes, His wisdom, His promises, or His desire for us to be close to Him. Instead, the spotlight was on how long you knelt. How many times you prayed your rosary. Whether you remembered the proper order of prayers or the call and response and associated hand motions. Joyful noise was strewn by the wayside, and stoic conformity stocked up like communion wafers.

4) If you thought it, you did it. This one, I think, is nearly impossible to reconcile for anyone with trauma, anxiety, depression, etc. The symbolism is the reality. The thought is the action. Grumbled internally about wanting to throw your cubicle-mate's carrots out the window the next time she crunches during a meeting? Congratulations - you just stole and destroyed property. Even the precogs in Minority Report were a little less nit-picky. 

I remember the first time we had communion at my new church. After taking the wafer, I realized that it wouldn't be gluten-free, so I couldn't eat it without getting violently ill and having symptoms for weeks. I nervously approached my pastor's daughter, who I'd had a Bible study with and was therefore more comfortable with, and asked with absolute dismay what to do with it. It was THE BODY OF CHRIST! Anything other than taking it was quite unacceptable in my youth. 

Jen, to her credit, didn't laugh at me. She just said, "Stephane, it's a cracker. God knows your heart - He's not going to think you're bad if you throw it away." What a freaking revelation. I wasn't throwing Jesus in the trash. Jesus was in my heart - the cracker was in the trash. 

5) Baptism is a given, not by God, but by humans. There is nowhere in the Bible where a baptism is the cause of salvation. It is a symbolic death to your past that is given after salvation. An act of obedience for the great gift you've received. And I can say it's not anywhere in the Bible with a great deal more authority now, as I've actually been encouraged to read it and have done so.

When my oldest daughter was born, she had a congenital heart defect. Catholic (and well-meaning) family members wanted to sneakily baptize her when I said I wouldn't be doing infant baptism so that she would go to heaven if she died before or during her surgery. If I believed for one moment that God would toss an infant into the fiery pit for an original sin that was already paid for by Jesus' death, I can quite guarantee I would not be baptized myself because I'd be sprinting away from the church, as I did at the age of 15.

There's more, but I'm not trying to throw stones. This is the extent of what was on my heart to put here. This is the crux of what I wanted to say. I grew up with a cardboard cutout version of God, and have been given the gift of knowledge of a full, living, amazing God that I had no idea was there. I want everyone to have that. To have Him. To not accept the scales on their eyes, but view the full glory of our Father.